By Anthony Santino
Getting stuck on a deserted island would, in reality, probably be as scary as a coming across a murderous ghost. I mean, I like meat, so I’d have to kill wild animals for that—and I’m not exactly Rambo, so I don’t see that working too well. On top of that, I’m kind of a city kid (otherwise known as a “citiot” (like an “idiot,” but one by default by being from the city (one of my Long Island friends introduced me to that expression)). So I don’t think I’d be quite as good at surviving the wild as Bear Grylls.
Regardless of all of that, I will give myself some credit. I have pretty simple needs, I’m not overly dramatic in the face of adversity, and I like the beach. So being on a deserted island with one food, person and entertainment option of my choice might not be so bad. I’m a college student, so by default, I’m en route to being a master budgeter, and I think I can apply some of those skills to sustaining my life on the island. Here it goes…
If I had to settle with one food for an indefinite amount of time, I think I’d have to go with Perdue chicken nuggets. To put it mildly, there isn’t a better snack food.
I like chicken a lot, but I love Perdue chicken nuggets specifically. The breading on the chicken is perfect, no matter how long or short you cook them. Plus, if you make the nuggets really crispy on the outside, they thank you by being cooked to perfection on the inside. Even if I had to be cooped up on an island for 3 years all by myself, give me these nuggets and I’ll do just fine. Ketchup would be a great complement to them, but I don’t even need that.
As for the person I’d take with me, that would have to be my girlfriend. Aside from the fact that she’d kill me if I didn’t choose her, there’s a lot of upside to having her with me. For starters, we both love chicken, so the Perdue nuggets would be well appreciated in her company. We also spend a lot of quality time together (shocker, I know) so I’d have her to watch our shows and whatever else with. We also recently went to the Dominican Republic on spring break together, and our walks on the beach were nice and relaxing, so I wouldn’t hate getting to do more of that. And she’s just the cutest person I know, so that’s another cherry on top of the decision to have her as my guest on the deserted island.
Now, as for the entertainment I’d choose to have, I’d select a smart TV. If I could have it loaded with a premium cable package, even better. An array of sports and other networks with Netflix, Hulu, Spotify and more? Sign me up today, get me on a one-way flight, and I’ll hang out on an island for a while. Tom Hanks had to do it in Castaway, and I think I can do it standing on my head with the amenities I’ve chosen.
Give me chicken nuggets, my girlfriend, and cable on a smart TV for however long you need to, and I’m set. This hypothetical is also a good one because it forced me to narrow down to a few, important things I could live with if I had to. Of course, I’d miss my family and friends, but I don’t anticipate that such a situation would be a forever thing. I’d eventually get found by a passing ship, or an airplane, and then Kris Jenner would offer to be my manager and book me a reality show.